Nine days to go
Good morning everyone, hope this finds you well, as the bitterweetness of autumn arrives. It's been a searing hot summer in Europe; not to everyone's taste, but I was quite keen, and I certainly miss it now it's gone...at the same time, it is much better weather for getting to sleep in a tent now!
And so, it's nearly here- in 9 days time, I'm off to Ireland to begin the Atlantic Thread- so much planning and organising, so much thought and focus, worry about if it's going to work, and have put off writing this for a while as I've been feeling pretty overwhelmed- not so much about the travelling, but a bit more inwardly. My mum's health has been pretty bad over the summer, and I'm very anxious for her and about her, and about the rest of my family. Coupled with a busy work couple of months, and spending a lot of time on my military planning of this, that going on has felt very painful, and as you will all know, there is very little you can do about someone's health issues other than be there....and I won't be. It began to feel like the worst timing for me to be going away for so long, and set me on difficult trains of thought, questioning whether this trip is just self-indulgent or vain, and it's been an effort to keep up self-belief. Doing a lot (by my standards!) in self-promotion to keep fundraising and plugging really doesn't come naturally to me, and opened that thankless train of thought of wondering what other people think about it, overthinking, and giving that inner critic of mine a full time job complete with health insurance, company car and unlimited expense account. It's been a little bit rough.
On the other hand, messages of support and belief from pledgers and donators really has kept belief going when I couldn't supply that belief myself. I'm reminded of the benefits of connection, and that is what this whole thing is all about. And also, about crafts, about the difficulties of making artwork, and making ends meet in a world of mass-production. About the ocean, how it inspires us, how it is timeless and makes us feel small, in a good and honest way. About making a slow journey, with time to look at the simple processes of craftspeople, thinking about the past and the future. We live in such a time where mistrust and division is encouraged, the lines of separation are the ones being highlighted. I am going to highlight a coastline of connection. And I also want to highlight my beliefs in the healing powers of arts and crafts, making things to be beautiful is a good thing to do. Making things by hand takes time, and in that time, we think, we reflect, and we create memories as well as products...unwinding thread to knot it together thinking about colours and shapes and texture is what I do, and it is what millions of people, all with their own tears and joys, have done for thousands of years along this route. This is the Atlantic Thread.
I have taken a difficult decision over the last couple of weeks...spiralling costs and the need to work more, the worries of family have made it the best thing to do to break up the trip in two. It wasn't easy, and made me feel like I've failed a bit, but it's not something I'm dwelling on (much). I will be off for 6 weeks now from next Monday, travelling through Ireland, Brittany, the North of Spain and Portugal, and flying back from Faro at the end of October. Then will head back to Faro at Xmas, to go through the south of Spain and Morocco, and finish at the beginning of the new year. It's taken effort (doesn't everything!!!!) to focus on the positive points. I started this project absolutely broke, quite traumatised, really with just an idea...as my old friend Sarah used to say, 'You do do the things you really want to do, but they often take a bit longer than you want them to' She was right. I felt wrong, thinking it betrayed my idea of connection to break up this journey...but there's not really any way around that, and in a way, it might have some good outcomes- I can work more when I get back in the autumn, organise the exhibition so everything is planned before I do the last part of the journey. And above all else, I'm not going to be away for so long all at once when someone close is going through a very hard time.
Anyway, I'll sign off now, but more to come soon....this was a hard one to write, but I feel back in the swing of things now. Will write again before I leave, and keep this going a lot while I'm away. Love and light to you all, Billy xxxxxx
And so, it's nearly here- in 9 days time, I'm off to Ireland to begin the Atlantic Thread- so much planning and organising, so much thought and focus, worry about if it's going to work, and have put off writing this for a while as I've been feeling pretty overwhelmed- not so much about the travelling, but a bit more inwardly. My mum's health has been pretty bad over the summer, and I'm very anxious for her and about her, and about the rest of my family. Coupled with a busy work couple of months, and spending a lot of time on my military planning of this, that going on has felt very painful, and as you will all know, there is very little you can do about someone's health issues other than be there....and I won't be. It began to feel like the worst timing for me to be going away for so long, and set me on difficult trains of thought, questioning whether this trip is just self-indulgent or vain, and it's been an effort to keep up self-belief. Doing a lot (by my standards!) in self-promotion to keep fundraising and plugging really doesn't come naturally to me, and opened that thankless train of thought of wondering what other people think about it, overthinking, and giving that inner critic of mine a full time job complete with health insurance, company car and unlimited expense account. It's been a little bit rough.
On the other hand, messages of support and belief from pledgers and donators really has kept belief going when I couldn't supply that belief myself. I'm reminded of the benefits of connection, and that is what this whole thing is all about. And also, about crafts, about the difficulties of making artwork, and making ends meet in a world of mass-production. About the ocean, how it inspires us, how it is timeless and makes us feel small, in a good and honest way. About making a slow journey, with time to look at the simple processes of craftspeople, thinking about the past and the future. We live in such a time where mistrust and division is encouraged, the lines of separation are the ones being highlighted. I am going to highlight a coastline of connection. And I also want to highlight my beliefs in the healing powers of arts and crafts, making things to be beautiful is a good thing to do. Making things by hand takes time, and in that time, we think, we reflect, and we create memories as well as products...unwinding thread to knot it together thinking about colours and shapes and texture is what I do, and it is what millions of people, all with their own tears and joys, have done for thousands of years along this route. This is the Atlantic Thread.
I have taken a difficult decision over the last couple of weeks...spiralling costs and the need to work more, the worries of family have made it the best thing to do to break up the trip in two. It wasn't easy, and made me feel like I've failed a bit, but it's not something I'm dwelling on (much). I will be off for 6 weeks now from next Monday, travelling through Ireland, Brittany, the North of Spain and Portugal, and flying back from Faro at the end of October. Then will head back to Faro at Xmas, to go through the south of Spain and Morocco, and finish at the beginning of the new year. It's taken effort (doesn't everything!!!!) to focus on the positive points. I started this project absolutely broke, quite traumatised, really with just an idea...as my old friend Sarah used to say, 'You do do the things you really want to do, but they often take a bit longer than you want them to' She was right. I felt wrong, thinking it betrayed my idea of connection to break up this journey...but there's not really any way around that, and in a way, it might have some good outcomes- I can work more when I get back in the autumn, organise the exhibition so everything is planned before I do the last part of the journey. And above all else, I'm not going to be away for so long all at once when someone close is going through a very hard time.
Anyway, I'll sign off now, but more to come soon....this was a hard one to write, but I feel back in the swing of things now. Will write again before I leave, and keep this going a lot while I'm away. Love and light to you all, Billy xxxxxx
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